What to do After the First Date

What to do after the first date? It's a question that gets asked a lot. The rush of getting ready and meeting someone new is over. Now you get to think about that meeting, access how it went, decide if you would like to see them again.

Calling After the First Date

If you had a good time, and you think that they had a good time, it follows that one of you should be doing some calling.

This is hard. Everyone fears rejection, and even if you think the date went well, there is still the possibility floating around your mind that it didn't go well for them. What to do, what to do?

Stay relaxed. Take a few deep breathes, pick up the phone and start dialing. While the phone is ringing, hum. This steadies your pitch so you don't sound squeaky, or have your voice sound unnatural. Remember to smile, because, believe it or not, you can actually hear a smile in a person's voice.

Feel them out

As you are talking, try to get a sense of how the date was for them. When and if you get a chance, tell them how the date was for you. If you get the feeling that the date did go well, now is the time to talk about a second date.

Plan the Second Date

Your second date should be someplace quiet. This will give you the chance to chat and get to know them with minimal distraction.

The "Rules"

What about the wait-three-days-before-calling "rule?" We say, rubbish! Call before the three days if you feel like it. Call after the three days if you feel like it.

They are probably sulking around, doing the housework and balancing the checkbook, same as you are, waiting for you to call them!

What to do if they don't call

What if they don't call? Well, if you feel the date went well, call them! What if you call them, leave a message and they don't call back? Cut your losses. Perhaps they didn't get the message, but chances are good that the date didn't go as well for them as it did for you.

Be Kind

Remember this. It could be you the next time, and it is far kinder to tell the other person that you don't think you are suited for each other, than to have them waiting and wondering at the other end of the line. Remember the Golden Rule and treat others as you would like to be treated.

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